Natural World vs Spiritual World: Can they ever meet?

For years I was immersed in the beauty of nature.  I was literally spellbound by the changing colors of the leaves in the fall.  A single cloud in a deep blue sky left me unable to function in the world, and sent me to my hammock to lose myself in the cloud's quiet meandering across the sky.  I learned to paint watercolors so that I could immerse myself in memorizing every detail of every flower in my profuse gardens.  How gentle is a flower? How sweet is the rain?  With what kisses does the wind grace the cheek?  How soul satisfying is the day spent with the sun's warmth drenching our skin?

With all that beauty, I am left cold by animal's nature.  I can see that animals must survive and are willing to kill each other to be able to eat another day.  But I just do not understand why the hawk must snatch a baby bird from its nest and rip it apart in front of its tiny screeching sparrow parents.  I am not a friend of hawks. One year, I rehabilitated a storm tossed monarch butterfly.  I watched it grow in strength each day in its determination to make its migratory journey to Mexico. The day it was ready to fly, strong enough to be freed, I took it to the beach to watch its joyous splendor as it finally made its way to the sky. He circled my head once, then twice, then rose into the sky to begin his flight, when a hawk swooped in front of my face and ate him in one gulp.  I do not like hawks.  And there are people like that, too.  There are those who make their millions on the backs of the poor, or who are destroying the integrity of our seeds and foods so that they may profit, knowing full well they may be causing our fellow man, and ultimately even themselves, to become diseased.

I have to look at these two different aspects of nature and wonder, where does compassion meet nature? Does it ever? Is compassion a higher calling, one that we can only embrace when we rise above the animal in us all?

I look at the crumbled wings of this new butterfly before me now, the second one to stop at Rose's Rest Home for the Storm Tossed Monarchs, and I wonder how to reconcile the fact that left to the devices of the universe, this little guy would most likely be dead.  Should I have left him in the parking lot as I found him, struggling to get lift off of more than a few inches?  Should I have hoped a car would have come along and put him out of his misery?  I wonder what he feels now, as he sits in my window, sunning his damaged wings.  He knows he cannot fly, and I doubt he will ever make the long trip to Mexico.  He is just too damaged.  Is it better to keep him with me, with daily outings allowing him to drink the nectar from the flowers he cannot reach on his own?  Or do I free him now, and let him die trying?  I cannot bear the thought.

As people, what is expected of us, and why?  There was a time in our history when we lived as the animals did and it was equally beautiful and harsh. We knew our way in the world, we understood what we needed to do to survive.  At best, we prayed gratefully before we devoured our kills.  At worst, we waged war for power.  But as the world evolves, whenever people evolve spiritually, they see that war is unnecessary, that we do not really need to kill to survive anymore. Eating nuts and berries sustained us.  Eating meat is as barbaric to me as cannibalism.

We are entering a time of grace.  The more I seek it, the more I see it, and the more I see a need for it.

Diary 10.4.10

Okay, so a year of grace is really hard, and I fail often.  One would say that I live as close to a good life as anyone can easily imagine.  I have given up the desire for possessions.  I care so little about what I have I have ceased to care what my home looks like.  Not my choice, necessarily, but imposed upon me by God.  I am pretty much a hermit, again, not necessarily chosen but imposed upon by God.  I understand why. God is a jealous God, and the only way I can be at God's hand when needed is to be alone enough to hear the call.  It has been six years since I have been in a relationship.  I know that if I am to have another one, God will make it very clear who I am to be with, and it will be an arranged marriage, as they all have been.  In choosing to live, yes, to NOT die, so many years ago, I handed over my privilege of choice to God. I live 100% according to God's will...and when I don't, I make a fool of myself.   When God does not jump in and help me with certain decisions, you can be sure any decision I make will be bad.

There is a certain comfort in the way I live now. The rules are as clear as if they were written in stone.  Its only when I am stupid that I suffer. It is extremely hard to give up all of my will, yet that is what is required of me.  Actions I would not choose, or would resist, must be followed through or I will suffer.  Strangely, life is a great deal better when I allow myself to ignore my wishes and follow God's will, but it is amazing what an incredible power our desire has over us to want to pursue our own way.  For instance, God has made it abundantly clear what I must be a Mormon, without letting me know why.  Thy will be done.

 I want to want to be a Mormon, but it is insanely hard because I just cannot stand the mass mentality of it, the lack of individual thinking, the strictures of the religion! I see the greatest strength of the Mormons is that they do everything God wants them to, to the best of their ability.  That is what God wants.

Mormons also praise Jesus to the ends of the earth and truly, I have nothing against that, I support it, but God has told me otherwise.  There was a day I stood at the edge of the woods and I asked, "God, is this what you want? Do you want me to go forth into the world proclaiming that all should follow Jesus?" The sun instantly became overcast, the brilliant blue sky clouded over and became dark.  It was so instant, that I asked in a different way, "Do you NOT want me to go forth and proclaim that all should follow Jesus?" The clouds immediately dispersed, the sky was once again a brilliant blue and the sun shone strongly.

Which of course leaves me to wonder why I am to be a Mormon when the sacrifices of Jesus are the basis of the religion.  *sigh* All I can do is go forth and make mistakes.    The only way to find out what God wants from me is to make the wrong decision, say the wrong thing, and bammo.  God will sock it to me and then I will know I have done it wrong.  It is not incorrect to say that I take a step, stop, duck, await the fallout, then move slowly forward one more step at a time, in exactly this way, every day of my life.  God is hard on me, but blesses me in many ways as well.

Religion

A lot of my references are to Christianity, and one would logically assume that I consider myself a Christian. I am not not a Christian, it is just not the only spiritual way I would define myself.  Its interesting to note how many Christians do not understand what Christianity is, where it came from, how it evolved, and why it is so hard to be Christ Like.  It was actually a ploy to keep the masses powerless, which I find not only interesting, but critical to knowing who we are as a primarily Christian nation.  It is also important because understanding Christianity helps us understand others who are not.  Understanding brings Peace and that being my goal, I want to ask you a few things.

What do these words mean to you, and what images do they conjure?
Pagan
Christ
Christian
Native American spirituality
Hindu
Wiccan
Priest
God
Godess
Holy Spirit

Would it surprise you to know that the Native American Great Spirit is most likely the same thing as the Christian Holy Spirit?  That Wiccans, Natives, and Pagans honor the Mother, as in Mother Earth, but that all of those as well as Hindu, all ask the same things of their followers?

Most people who have a deep and reciprocal relationship with God recognize that there can only be one God for one reason.  The universal demands placed upon all of us comes with the same basic requirements, no matter what religion we practice.

Would it surprise you to know that Wicca is basically a Love based religion? Pagan means nothing more that Country Dweller.  Native Americans did not practice witchcraft or devil worship.  While they did (and do) honor the spirits of all things, it is because they recognize that the Holy Spirit of Life and God runs through absolutely everything.  And in those practices, they do so far far more than many practices of Christianity.

Would it surprise you to consider that Christ came to Christians because they needed him, and that the messages he brought were the same messages the White Buffalo Calf Woman and Krishna and others brought?  Would it surprise you to know that Mary embodies Christ, not just as a Mother, but as a bringer of Christ in all ways?  Change it all around and you will find the love, the basic love and truth, that circulates the globe in all religions.  The weakest have always been the kindest.  They did not lose the war because they were weak.  The lost because they truly knew love.  But Love is returning now.  Be Love.